I'm GoInG tO pArTy LiKe It'S 1999!!!

I am overwhelmed with Joy....What?!? I can hear the shock from the crowds. Brittney overwhelmed with Joy..?!?! Well you would be to....if....
After almost five years Mr and Mrs Thompson are finally not going to have 9 am Church.
I know you can boo me later...Im sure most of you thought I was announcing Parenthood for the Thompsons.
But....
This is almost just as huge!
See Morgan and I have had 9 o'clock church sense we were first married. By moving twice and then to a ward that never changed. There was only one ward in the building and they liked 9am church. (Kelly let us both have a moment of silence for the Belvedere Ward.)
And then we moved into our ward now which was 9 am and has been for the last year. So...overwhelmed with JoY!
I'm GoInG tO pArTy LiKe It'S 1999!!!
Now if I could just make some friends in my new ward so I can socialize with other people besides Morgan. (No offense Morgie, Your Hot) Britt just needs some friends!

Today is a new day!

I just wanted to let you all know that I am still with you all and did not get committed or walk into on-coming traffic. With the help of a couple very dear friends...I came to my realization and my New Years Resolution. What is...IS!
The fact that good and bad people around me get to have babies and I don't...haS nothing to do with me. Do I still get sad? Yes! Am I still jealous of other people and there fertility? Hell Yes! Will I still remind pregnant women to shut-up and stop complaining? You better believe it!
I am though going to take my couple of minutes to be sad and then really try to be positive. I was really sad though all weekend and could just not figure out why.
Not being a Mom is something that I only I can deal with. I am the only one who lives in my head (well that's up for discussion) I can only tell myself how to feel.
So for my New Years Resolution I am going to try really hard to be positive!
I should tell you this....
Monday going to work I was so upset but hid my feelings pretty well. And then tuesday I looked at my cute friend who I see as a sister and thought...What am I upset about. So I gave her a big hug (We both cried) I told her I loved her and that I was here for her. I felt so great after! Letting my hurt feelings go had never made me feel better! I told her that I think I am a very strong person. I have been on this rollar coaster for almost FIVE years and I always bounce back. Once again the brick wall....I can take the beating. I Think.....
Well now that all of that is said....
I'M GOING TO DISNEYLAND SUCKERS!
LOVE LOVE LOVE

Feeling out your emotions

I feel guilty sometimes when I sit down to write these blogs. I sometimes want to just tell myself to shut up! Blogging to me is therapy and the people who comment on my blog are really wonderful people! So I feel like I am sitting in a room with a group of friends venting my emotions.
So Anyway....
I should not even be writing this but its my blog and I can write about any damn thing I want. A dear friend of mine who I work with and have known sense the was 16. I trained her and think of her like a little sister. Well she texted me friday night and announced to me that she and her boyfriend were having a baby. I was devastated! I have cried more over this then I did when we had our last failed placement. I couldn't respond to her TEXT and nor did I go to our office party that was the night after. She said, "I know you will be happy for me." I'm not happy for her!
I am a bitter ugly angry person again. I know that I have been fighting it for a couple of months hoping that this side of me would not re-surface but she has!
I am hurt and the tears keep running down my face. I want so badly to have the compassion for her that I know she deserves. How hard this must have been for her. But I can only seem to dwell on my own selfish feelings.
Yesterday instead of counting my blessings I screamed at my husband. Almost the whole day! I was a person who I hate! A person that I do not want to be. I am that girl again who cried every month going to the Doctors to be told that all the meds were not working. The person who layed on a table half dressed while I listened thru the paper thin walls of the couple hearing the heart beat for the first time and just crying!
I am back to my scary dark bitter side!
So my husband asks me what he can do for me? I wish I knew! I wish I was a stronger person. I wish with 100% of my whole heart that I could just forget about being a Mom and MOVE ON! Like accept the cards that have been dealt to me....and play the damn game of life!
And...I have to go to work tomorrow and I don't know how to act or what to say? How am I going to do this without walking outside into on-coming traffic?

The Tree

Ladies and Gentleman....My Christmas tree! I am actually really proud of this tree. The idea started at a dental meeting I went to in Las Vegas in October. It was right after the Adoption Saga and I needed to keep my mind busy so I wouldn't dwell on The Brick Wall. So during this meeting I found my mind straying so I decided to sketch. I started sketching some ideas about making my tree out of paper. I had wanted to do this last year but just never got around to it. I was so excited to have a project to fill my time with.
I am super excited because it turned out better then I had imagined.

So now my tree is up, my shopping and wrapping is done. I can just relax and enjoy the holidays! I Love Christmas!

This wreathe took me the longest! It was totally worth it though. I am thinking of making another one after Christmas to hang on my door. If anyone is interested....Let me know.

This is just my centerpiece on my coffee table. I did not spend any money on this. The ornaments are what I usually use as well as the ribbon. And I have a TON of pine cones from my cousins wedding that I use every now and then. Thanks Jody for all of the pine cones. They have come in handy many times!

CoMiNg SoOn....

Pictures of my Christmas Tree. I made ALL of the ornaments from paper. It took me a total of probably 3 days...IT WAS SO WORTH IT! I am in love with the way it turned out. Pictures coming soon!

I hope everyone had a GREAT thanksgiving! I LOVE Thanksgiving! It has always been my #2 favorite holiday. This year was my sides turn in the rotation so we traveled to my parents house for dinner. I was in charge of the table setting...(My favorite assignment). Side note...Jenilyn or Jamie if you ever read my blog please show Pam these pictures. She would be so proud of me.
The flowers were my favorite part. I am kind of starting a side floral buisness for myself. I did some of the flowers for my sisters wedding and then did all of my cousins. I also have a couple more upcoming weddings. Anyway...I have really enjoyed doing it.

This year I am thankful for many things so I thought I would make a list....(In NO Particular Order)
1. My Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ
2. My husband and Best Friend Morgan James Thompson
3. My Dog Mable
4. My Parents
5. My Husbands Parents
6. My Siblings and there Spouses
7. My Talents
8. The roller coaster of Adoption. Even though I am REALLY feeling the motions of this. I know one day I will experience the Joy in the process.
9. Our Caseworker MaryAnne!
10. My Job and the people I work with.
11. My Home
12. My friends
13. My husbands job
14. My Grandparents, Uncles, Aunts and Cousins
15. Rorie and Peighton
16. DisneyLand
17. SYTYCD
18. My Christmas tree
19. My hubbys kisses

And...I am just very thankful for my life and EVERYTHING in it! The good, The bad and The ugly!


#1

Here are a couple of pictures of the table I did at Thanksgiving!

So I could not resist posting pictures of my cute family on Halloween
...and Yes...
Morgan and I are wearing matching t-shirts.
Judge us all you want
...We don't care!
Mable was the cutest little bumblebee!

Lack of Blogging

So does anyone check my blog anymore??

I have been such a blogger loser lately. For quite sometime I checked everyone's blog (almost) everyday and was excited to read about all the new and fabulous things people were doing. But ever since Morgan and I were thrown up against a brick wall, not really feeling the whole blogging scene. When I refer to the brick wall I mean... what is Adoption. Cause for us right now it is a brick wall! You get thrown up against it your face smashed up against the rough surface just to step away and realize that even though you have a couple of scratches and cuts, Your Fine! And your still on the other side of that dumb brick wall!

So what have we been doing?...

I decided that I needed a project to get my mind off the massive HUGE brick wall I was standing up against. So I am making my Christmas Tree decorations entirely out of paper. I am excited about how this will turn out and hope that it turns out as cute as it looks in my head. (Pictures to come)

I got a new calling....Drum Roll Please! Primary Singing Person! Hold back your laughter...Especially you Kelly! :) When the bishop asked me, Morgan OUTLOUD started laughing. Because the thought of his wife standing up and singing and leading ANYONE in song was to much for him to take. A part of me died that day!

Morgan got a new laptop...BORING! He has been basking in it's glory the entire day. I would not be surprised if him and the fedex man didn't embrace! School is going really well this semester and even though he is busy, he has not freaked out yet. He is allowed a couple of freak-outs every semester.

We are going to DisneyLand in December and I am so freakin excited!!

Mable is still the cutest Dog and I dressed her up for Halloween. I have decided that because I have no children I am going to become a Crazy dog lady. I dressed her up as a bumblebee! I will have to post a picture later. She was so stinkin cute!

Anyway...
Please someone comment on this post so I know that my Mom is not the only person who reads this...LOVE YOU MOM, YOUR THE BEST!

pEAcE

Blah!

I have started and deleted this post oh about 100 times. I have nothing to say! The sweet little birth mom decided to parent her daughter. I did know she was having a girl...which in a way made it worst. I could picture her in my mind! I think people (especially our caseworker) are waiting for me to open up and let out all of my thoughts and feelings. I really don't have any! After we got the news Morgan and I just kind of stared at each other and both thought, What did we just go through? Was that for real? Were we that close and then not close at all.

I don't know....

What I do know is...

I have an amazing husband who I love more then ever! He was my rock! We have an amazing caseworker who I love! There were so many days that I wanted to drive to her office lay on her couch and just cry. Instead I cried on the phone, probably every day! I am surrounded by people who loves us and only want good things to happen to us!

So to sum everything up...

Morgan and I had the longest two and half weeks of our lives! Cried and screamed every day. Prayed countless times. Planned what we would do. Talked and Talked. Didn't Sleep! And now...Blah!

That Sucks!

Morgan's First Post

Well let me let you guys know that I have never had this big of an audience. This may the be the second time I have ever blogged. My beautiful Brittney didn't feel like updating everybody on the adoption status. Well let me begin from the start........

I am terrible with dates so I am not going to give you any, because frankly I couldn't. Anyways, a couple of weeks ago our case worker was speaking with a birth mom that was indecisive on placing her baby. She has had 10 couples profiles with her to help her decide, but didn't see any that stood out to her. While in our case worker's office she noticed our brochure that we had made for our adoption yard sale (thanks again for all that helped with that). Well she read the brochure and really liked it. Come to find out that she had our profile for about 4 months and she didn't realize it. Things were said and the birth mom and her mom wanted to see us. She wanted to put a face on the whole process and hoped it would help her make a definite decision.

We were okay with this and had a great meeting with the two of them. The mom was very nice and supportive of her daughter. The daughter was very nice, but definitely had a lot to think about. All in all, the meeting went awesome and our case worker even thought so. (I thought this was very funny, but the birth mom said that I was just like her. Quiet and laid back is the only way to be!)

Currently, we are waiting for her to make this very difficult decision and she is due tomorrow! Well we hope she makes the decision that is right for her and we can only hope for the best. All I can do right now is hug and kiss my nervous wreck of a wife. Good thing she is still super cute even in the state that she is in.

Well thanks for listening and I am going to tell all my signature sign off.

Thompson Out!

(this is always how you will know its the Morgster)

The Clomid Club

So I decided that I would write this post and dedicate it to all the Women who have ever taken Clomid or thinking about it. Thanks Meredith for inspiring me...
So Clomid is a fertility drug that is given to Women to stimulate ovulation. For some this is a miracle drug and helps them get pregnant. For others..like myself gives them a lot of horrific (humorous) stories. I thought I should share a couple of them with you.
Side note...Clomid is given to poeple in 50mg amounts. Each month you take it pending on if you ovulate or not your Dr. will bump you up. Well my first Dr. took me up to 150mg. My second Dr. took me up to 205mg I wish you could know that I am screaming the 250mg!!! The side effects are...(to my knowledge) Headaches, Mood Swings, Weight Gain, Mood Swings, Nausea and have I mentioned MOOD SWINGS!!!
Let me share some examples of you the mood swings. WARNING....I might use some choice words and be a little personal so stop reading if you are easly offended.
All of these experiences happened during the five days you take this medicene...
* Morgan and I were in Wal-Mart and I saw a women who was pregnant and had two younger children probably under the age of 2 or 3. One walking around with no shoes, red face, snot everywhere and crying. (She was yelling at him to, "Shut the Hell Up before I give you a reason to cry". The other in a diaper (only) in the cart also crying. I sat there and stared in the middle of the isle and saw myself lunging toward the woman. I then started filling with so much rage that Morgan had to escort me out of the store. Him saying nothing (Smart Guy) just putting me in the car.
* Usually I would not even work while I was on this stuff because my co-workers could not handle all of the mean things I would say. Well I decided I would go to work because I was feeling pretty good. Well they sent me to the post office and there was the cutest women (not screaming at her child) playing with her adorable 2 year old. I had a COMPLETE melt down in the middle of the post office. Like the sobbing crying that you cant even catch your breathe. I believe the little old lady standing behind me said it best, Honey...You need to take a deep breathe. Needless to say I could barely calm down enough to call my work and tell them I was going home.
* WARNING--Extremely personal...Morgan and I were in the shower together (I know...is anyone shocked?) Well we were being all lovey dovey and I think he turned his back to me and I completely lost it and started crying that he didnt love me and that I was better off without him...Who the hell knows. I think all Morgan did was get out of that shower as fast as he could to avoid his head being banged up against the tile wall. SMART MAN!
(Morgan just said...."Woman what are you doing, I can't control you.")
I have many many more but I'm tired. I feel like I am a legend and should be given a medal because at 250mg...I DIDNT KILL ANYONE! My husband is especially grateful. He is the one who deserves a medal because we are still married. I could not even count the times I told him I was going to divorce him. He would just calmly pat me on the head and tell me he would talk about it after the drugs were out of my system.

You need to find the humor in all things....

I would like to share a story that will allow you a glimpse of how royally broken I am...(Literally)
So someone (for confidential purposes we will call this lady Barbara) Anyway...Barbara called me and told me that she had gone to the Dr. to try and find out why she was not getting pregnant. Well she was telling me how everything went and the her Dr. had suggested she go on some miracle drug called Privera. That he had found HUGE success in women getting pregnant from taking this drug. She asked what he would suggest over Clomed (The drug from hell). He said he would put anyone on Privera instead of Clomed. Well he was hopeful that she could be pregnant from this drug within months. Well after hanging up with Barbara I called my mom frantic and so upset, Why had my Dr. not ever suggested this miracle drug. I mean come on...these Dr's shared a freakin office. Why was I not clued in on this little secret that had such a huge success rate.
"Mother, blah blah blah...Why did he not ever put me on the drug called Privera?"
"Brittney...Honey... (just side reference, my mom filled all of my prescriptions for 3 years) You did take Privera with Clomed."
"Oh...that sucks!"
So I was taking this so called miracle drug with the hell drug for THREE, 3, tres years and NOTHING!!!
I had to laugh because of course I am that broken! Stupid broken in-fertile Brittney! Go ahead and laugh at yourself!

Come and Support Adoption

We need EVERYONE who reads this to immediately copy and paste it to there blog! Lets spread the word people!
We are having our Yard Sale this coming
Saturday August 22 from 8 to 3
8085 South Leslie Drive (3905 West)
We are doing this for two reasons...
1. To raise money for our adoption fees.
2. To make contact with people we never would otherwise.
Please come and support us! We have many pieces of furniture, an electric dryer, lots of clothes for kids and adults, prom dresses and even wedding dresses!
PLEASE SPREAD THE WORD!

Adoption Yard Sale

ATTENTION ANYONE WHO LOVES THE THOMPSON'S AND WANTS TO SEE THEM GET A BABY...
We are having a Yard Sale August 22!! We are having this yard sale for two BIG reasons!

1. Everyone who comes to the yard sale will receive information about us and our quest to add to our family through adoption. People that we usually would never make contact with...will get to. Yea!
This reason alone is why we are doing this but there is also a # Dos. (Did I spell that right?)

2. To raise some money for our adoption fees. All of the money that is raised for our Yard Sale will go toward our adoption fees. Morgan and I have now had the opportunity three times to adopt through a private agency. Well then what the heck Thompson's...why don't you have 3 babies? Because and this a is a Big Because. The fees to adopt through a private agency range from 30,000 - 60,000. I don't know about you, but we do not have that kind of money! So we are doing everything we can to put our self in a situation to do so.

All items that are not sold will be donated to a local charity. PLEASE help us! We need as many donations as we can get. Large and Small...EVERYTHING WILL HELP!
Items can be delivered to our home or we will be more then willing to pick them up. Please contact us ASAP if you are able to help.
Please post this on your blog if you can or email as many people with our link. Also if anyone in your neighborhoods, wards or families could help. We would be so very appreciative!
Come on guys..this is the year Thompsons are going to grow plus 1!

Five years and counting....

Today is Morgans and I FIVE year wedding anniversary. It feels like yesterday that we got married until I think about all of the things that we have done. The other night Morgan and I were laying on the floor in our living room with our little Mable next to us. He had his arms wrapped around me and I was cuddled up under his arm. It was one of those moments....The Moments I know it is my Heavenly Father who taps me on the shoulder and reminds me how blessed I am. I truly am married to my very best friend. We started that way and it has been that constant friendship that has sustained us. No one makes me laugh like Morgan, and no one can make me feel better like he does. Sometimes he doesn't even need to say anything...He gets me! My husband has wiped away many many tears from my cheeks and held me as I have cried.
I know that I was meant to be with him.
Heavenly Father knew what he was doing when he turned our heads toward each other.
Morgan I love you so much! Way more then I did when we were married! Thank you for supporting me and always calming me down! I know it drives you crazy when I say, "High Five Buddy!" But...you are my Buddy! You are also my Hot Husband who I love (like crazy love)! Happy Anniversary Baby! I hope each year just gets better and better!

Morgan and I on our Wedding Day August 5, 2004

This hot young skinnier couple is Us on our honeymoon!

Road Trip

Well Morg and I decided to celebrate our Anniversary a little early due to time off at work. So we headed to Portland...First reaction...Kind a Lame. But I had never been before and Morgan has an Uncle and Aunt there that I had never met. So we decided to make it a week long vacation and drive the 900+ miles and head west. Usually I like to plan out our vacations with, places to visit, places to eat and have a game plan. This time we threw everything up in the air and headed out with NO PLAN! Thompsons are going crazy!
Well I knew that I would have fun because I always have fun with my hubby, but I had no idea how much I would LOVE Portland. It did help that Morgans family, Uncle Jack, Aunt Joe that we stayed with are the SWEETEST people. They have a beautiful home in Battleground, Washington that is in the country and surrounded by trees. They took such good care of us!
Well the first day we were there we headed into Portland to check out the city. We first went to the Japanese Garden and then the Rose Garden. Both were so so beautiful!
We then headed to a little shopping area to spend some quality alone time at
CRATE & BARRELL!
My Most favorite store...Ever! As we were walking in I gave Morgan the rules.
1. No dumb jokes
2. Give me my space
3. And dont rush me!
Sounds a little crazy....It is and I dont care! He was the best husband and followed all of the rules and even let me buy whatever I wanted! Seriously that goes very far in the
BEST HUSBAND EVER category!
Well walking out of there I just didnt think this day could get any better......
WELL IT DID
As we walked around the corner the gates of heaven opened and there it was...
Cue the sounds of heaven....
THE CONTAINER STORE
At this point...I think Morgan said, Oh my hell! He had just lost his wife! I was like a kid in a candy store....Not even close because I never went down the candy isle or the toy isle of a store. I ALWAYS went down the paper isle. How many kids open a library in her room where family memebers could check out there own books and magazines.
Yes thats write...I even had a card catelog.
It was rediculous how much I loved that store. They had every kind of container you could imagine. They had a row of just filing folers in every color you could think of
(Post coming soon just on just that isle).
The rest of that day was a little bit of a blur...I was blissfully happy!
Well the rest of the vacation was another trip to Crate and Barrell, Morgan buying an Iphone, Going to Seattle for a night, Seeing the Salt Lake Bees play the Portland Beavers and lots of good food! I know most of this post was filled with all of my crazy OCD but it was AWESOME! I had such a fun time and Morgan was the sweetest! Pictures below....

Morgan and I at the Japaneese Garden overlooking downtown Portland

Morgan showing off his Kung Foo Panda Moves

The Famous Fish throwers at the Public Market

The best Farmers Market, the had flower bouguets
for only $10

So I am the only one who is allowed to make fun of my big hair and sometimes
when I do not straighten in...I say that it looks like the Red Head on Fraggle Rock.
Well ta da...they had a picture!

Our Bedroom Makeover

Well we finally finished our Bedroom! I have been dying to do something to this room since the day we moved in! I LOVE how it turned out! It feels like such a grown-up bedroom. We were able to purchase all new furniture. Morgan did all of the painting himself and new 6 inch base boards for my birthday gift. The only thing we kept were the closet doors. They look so much better now that they reflect something beautiful instead of a bare white room. I actually really like them. I had to find my inner Candace Olsen and keep them. She will put mirrors on everything if she could.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

So really fast I have to share this really cute story...
Yesterday I had my entire family over for dinner and I was reading a letter that we are going to send out to all of our family and friends letting them know how they can help connect us to a birth mom. Well I was reading this to my Mom and Aunt Kristy. Well my cousin Riley who is 9 was also listening. I read the letter and this is what happened....
After a minute of Riley not saying anything he says...

Riley: Mom, I wonder if Shauna wants to keep her baby.
Aunt Kristy (Mom): (With a shocked look) Yea Ri, I think she wants to keep her baby.

She then looks at me and whispers, That's our bishops wife. We all busted out laughing except for Riley. He was totally serious! He said, "She has like 6 kids already".
Thanks Riley for watching out for me! So if you are pregnant and a 9 year old, blonde hair boy comes up to you and asks you if you want to keep your baby. Don't be offended, he just really wants his cousin to get a baby! I love you Riley!

This is what happens when you don't lock the kennel and then leave the dog for 5 hours..UNSUPERVISED....

This is what my pillow looked like before Mable....

This is what it looked like after....


Have you ever developed like 200 pictures off of your camera and then gone through them and put them in piles of how you want to put them in your scrapbook? Well I bet you never thought your dog would climb up on your desk and destroy all of those piles....




Only those who backcomb there hair would understand this major loss! This is my most favorite "Big Hair" comb...RIP!
And you had better believe that I told Morgan...I told you so!

Mommy Club Part 2

I feel like I should title these long drawn out blog entry's the same thing. Only because...if you see the title you will say to yourself....Brittney is a bummer today and you will click the back button on your computer and move on to someone else's blog. Full of love, joy and overwhelming happiness.
As a in-fertile person...I have some bad days. Not like any of you people reading this dont have your bad days...I fully acknowledge that everyone has them and everyone has there own problems. I just feel like I am in a club and I am one of those nerdy girls that everyone is nice to but really hopes to never be caught alone with that girl afraid she will invite you do something.
Today I am sad, I am feeling sorry for myself. I am starting to become im-patient again. Yes, I said AGAIN! I thought that I had gotten over all of this (in-fertile) stuff. YEA RIGHT!! I was in deep denial!! I know that I have every right to be im-patient and sad. The thing that scares me is that....I was once in a very bitter deeply sad place in my life. I call it...Fertility Hell!! I am so afraid that I am on my way back there. I do not want to be that person! I want to be able to know that when people I know (Especially people I deeply care for) announces to me that they are expecting there bundle of joy, I will have a lagitimate smile on my face. How sad for the person on the other end who is so excited to tell a person like me that they are prego and I immediatly bust into tears. BUZZ KILL! People that are expecting should be excited, Hell..I would be shouting it from the roof tops! I would put it on the jumbo tron and the next sporting event. IN-FERTILE BRITTNEY THOMPSON...CENCEIVES CHILD!! It would be on the news! I don not want to go back to that person!
I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father who lets me have these days, moments and hours to feel sorry for myself. Because without fail, he lets me and then he immediatly wraps his arms around me! I am just in the feeling sorry for myself stage. I need a miracle to happen! I need to have that....It was totally worth it moment! I need to not be that nerdy girl who wants into the Mommy Club so badly! I need to be that Mom who remembers the days without the craziness.
Thanks for letting me vent...to share my feelings! My poor husband...All he can say now is...I know Honey!

Make a Smilebox slideshow

I never thought it would happen!

First let me say...Hawaii was Awesome! I will post pictures another time. I missed Morgan so much and cried almost every night! But thanks to the ladies I was with, I made it all 8 days without him!
On to the "I never thought it would happen"....
When Morgan and I had been married oh like 6 months...He said to me once...

Morgan: I cant wait until we can get a dog!

Me: Umm...I never want a dog!

(Side note, Morgan grew up with little house dogs and I grew up with big outside dogs!)
After a long pause...Morgan looked at me,

Morgan: Are you serious?
Me: Yes...I never want a dog!
Morgan: This is something we really should have talked about before we got married.

Like it was a deal breaker that I never wanted a dog. I know you might think that he was joking, but he was 100% SERIOUS!
Well fast forward many conversations and five years later...We finally own our own home. A home that you do not have to have special permission to have a pet or pay extra for a pet.
My nightmare was going to become a reality..It was just a matter of time.
Well I finally caved..This was a battle I knew I would never win.
So I gave my lists of demands:
1. We would not get the unknown animal until Morg was done with school for the summer.
2. I would get to have final say on the animal.
3. I got to name the pet!
4. Morgan would be the one to clean up all mishaps (the dirty stuff).
5. Instead of buying a puppy, we would adopt our puppy from the Human Society of Utah. If we are going to adopt our children we should also adopt our pets. It only seemed right!

Well let me introduce you to...Mable Baby Lee Thompson (Mable)


This was her first day in our home...Morgan was IN LOVE!

Last week Morgan was sick and Mable would not leave his side!

So the thing that I never thought would happen is...I am in love with this animal! I do all of the things I said I would never do! I hold her like my baby...I talk like she is my baby! I love her so much! She has already become a part of our little family. She is just the most chill little dog! I am so happy we brought her home. Morgan constantly gives me the look...I told you so!

Well if you weren't jealous about Wicked....I only have one more trick up my sleeve. This Thursday at approximately 11:50am..I will be getting on a airplane and going to
HAWAII!!

Can you even stand it....I am so beside my self with excitement. My fabulous employer is taking our entire staff. So in your face Dr. Issacson who just takes his staff out to dinner!
The one sad thing is...I know..can you even believe there is a sad part to this story. Is that my Morgie will not be going with us. He did have a ticket but it is right in the middle of his finals and his teachers would not let him take the finals early. Which is so STUPID. They said if they did it for him, they would have to do it for everyone. Who on earth would want to take finals early...Except for the ones who have a ticket to HAWAII!
We were originally supposed to go for two weeks but no one wanted to leave there kids, Husband (Me) for that long. So they changed it to 8 days. Which is still a long time for me to be away from my hub. He keeps reminding me that he will be in "School Hell" so I need to enjoy myself. I work with great people so I know I will have fun and I will laugh a lot!
So Honolulu here I come!
And for the record...Sense Morg and I got married I have
not spent more then 3 days away from him....Am I a complete Sap?

I am so freaking excited I can not even stand it!!
This is where I will be tomorrow night in case any of you were wondering....

I have seen this Musical before (2 years ago) in Chicago...I LOVED IT SO MUCH! I sat on the edge of my seat with my hands sweating like a wet rag. Yes, my hands sweat when I get excited, nervous, sad...ya know. I even cried I liked it so much! So I just wanted to shout it out that...I AM SO FREAKING EXCITED!! Lots of Love to all of you who do not get to go! I will be thinking about you on the edge of my seat, with my hands sweating it up!

Well first I want to get a huge high five!! I have finally figured out how to download images in the order I want them! Can I get a Woo Woo!! I am overwhelmed with joy about this!
Morgan and I LOVE being homeowners! We have had so much fun these last couple of weeks doing all sorts of cute things to our house!
The first project I am going to highlight is our little office. It is very important to us that no matter the room we make it cute. Morgan also spends a lot of time in this room so it had to be a nice place for him so he could get his creative juices flowing.
We put this room together for easily less then $150 total! Most of the things we already owned. Also we included a trip to Lowes and IKEA to top everything off.

Before Pictures

Pre-Paint

After
The shelves we got from IKEA they are 25 each and the frames
I already had. Instead of pictures in the 3 on the bottom shelf
I put three different sheets of scrapbook paper to add a little color!
I LOVE the way this room turned out!

We wanted to put something on the wall to break up the dark color. So
Morgan sketched this design out and we taped up the wall. This took us all day!
Thank Heavens for Conference on the radio!
I was kind of nervous about this at first....but I also Love it and think
it turned out so much better then I thought! The pain I have in
my arms from painting this is so worth it!

I just wanted to Thank those of you sent me texts to my phone! When I asked that no one leave comments I did not mean that to be mean. It is just sometimes hard to hear what people want to tell you. I am sure everyone can relate to this.
I am just so amazed when people find out that you are going thru something terrible, they think it is there responsibility to give you advice. (Especially some of my patients!) When I am going thru something really crappy I just want someone who loves me to tell me, "You know what, that really sucks!" "I love you and I'm sorry!"
I am feeling much better and I am not as sad as I was on Monday and Yesterday. I didnt expect to be as sad as I was. My caseworker called me on tuesday to ask how we were doing. She said that I should be said, because it was a loss. I should be sad and then try not to be sad. I needed to hear that. She said take a couple of days!
I know one day I will look back at this time and be in shock to how my life has changed. And I have been the one telling friends this very thing. Its just hard to live it!

How much can you take?

Yesterday Morgan and I went to see a movie and when we were leaving I checked my phone. It was 6:33pm Sat. There were 5 text messages, missed calls and voice mails. I am never that popular! Three of the missed calls were from LDS Family Services. I immediately felt a rush of emotion and started crying. Checked my voice mail and it was from Tammy the supervisor at LDSFS. She needed me to call her back ASAP! I called her back and she said she had a question about our profile...OK...I thought. Answered her question and the she said. Well in that case...A Birth Mom has picked you as her #1 couple and she wants to place her baby. I asked when she was due and she said she didnt want to tell me yet. She would call the birth mom and call me back as soon as she knew more. I heard nothing last night and did not sleep. This morning at 8:45am Tammy called and gave me more info. The birth mom had delievered her baby yesterday morning. No one in her family knew she was even pregnant. I was heartbroken for her that she had to go thru that alone! She was supposed to have called Tammy by 8. Tammy said she would call us as soon as she heard something. Called again at 12:30pm and said that the birth Mom had told her family and they had talked her out of placing. Which was something that we knew. Knowing her culture, we knew that if the family found out most likely she would not place. So she had decided to Parent the baby.
My feelings right now are almost numb! I feel like Heavenly Father is protecting me from my own feelings. It was such a whirlwind of a night. Morgan and I were praying that no matter what happened we and the birth mom would be ok. I knew this would happen sometime or other but I am just asking myself how much of this I can take. This constant roller coaster that I am on.
What does the Lord have in store in for us? I am so aware of how much he knows me. I have felt him so much in my life lately. He has swept me up in his Arms as well as my Savior.
I am just writing this because it is therepy. To put it out to the world. I know some of you know exactly what I am going thru. And others try! Please do not leave any comments. Please just keep Morgan and I in your thoughts and prayers.

Back to Reality

Morg and I got back super late last night from San Francisco. We had so much fun! I will download some of our pictures soon. I just wanted to shout out this little note that I thought of this morning.
At the airport they announce what level we are for a terrorist attack or a security level. Well we were an orange yesterday for those who did not know that. I thought to myself today that as a in-fertile person I should have one of those monitors. This would be a tremendous help to my husband and family. Because I constantly feel like I am on a roller coaster. For example...I spent the last 3 days wrapped up in my husband. We saw a beautiful new city, shopped, ate....tore that city up. I did not think once about babies, lack of babies, adoption, birth moms. And as I found myself looking out the window to our park across the street I was right back on that rollar coaster.
So to have a monitoring system would be awesome! I could just tell my husband that I am a leval Green today. And he would know what to do, what to say and how to act.

Spring Break!

Morg and I are flying to San Francisco on Monday. Does anyone have any tips on places to go while we are there? Places to Shop, Eat or just See! Let Me Know!

love Love LOVE...

Our New Caseworker!
When we first started the process at LDSFS we were assigned to Kim, we only have love for Kimberly. But she had no go have herself a baby so we got assigned to Shannon. Shannon was a nice person but I had nothing in common with her. I was pretty bummed about the whole process! Well Shannon was re-assigned and now we are with MaryAnne! She came today for our Home Study. We needed to have a new one because of the recent move. All I can say is that in one point of the conversation, I have no clue what we were talking about. She said, "Kick there Trash!" It was then I knew it was love at first sight!
So Kimmie Baby I love you but I am finally over the loss of you choosing me over that little baby! (I would dump me for a little baby)
I heart MaryAnne!

Blog Spotlight

I have not really been on top of these as I would have liked! So for my next spotlight...
Megan...My sista!
I wanted to spotlight my sister because she is having an exciting year! Megan and her long time boyfriend Levi are getting married June 19th. I am so excited for them! Levi is a good match for my sister and they make me laugh. Megan is so excited to me the proud Mama of Lexi and Riley (Levis Dogs).
On Friday night my sister went to the dreaded grocery store for me. I was so shocked that she actually volunteered. Because who in there right mind would volunteer that.
When we were growing up Megan and I would fight so so much! My Mom would always tell me that I should be nice because my friends are going to come and go but I will always have my sister. Well she was not kidding. My sister is one of my Best Friends! She makes me laugh and is always fun to have around. I love the relationship Morgan and Megan have and I am so grateful she is my sister.
Meg I am so excited for all of the things you are going to do this year and I know you will be a Great wife and Mom (One day). Levi is a Super Lucky guy to have you! And I will do my best to convince him not to smash cake in your face.

Well here they are...I love our new little house! I cant wait to show you all of my projects that I have planned for this place. So stay tuned!

My empty room! My niece Peighton who is 4 will tell you..."This is for when they get a baby!"

Our little office which is a mess! Morgan right in the middle of a big dumb project!

Our 2nd upstairs bathroom. Kind of college style but will come in handy some day!

My linen closet! I have never had a linen closet so I am going to brag it up!

Our bathroom! Which is also in some need of some big time help!

Our BORING bedroom! It is so big and so EMPTY!
This is our stairs! I get really excited that I actually have stairs and they are not outside!
This is looking out our front window! We have a cute little park right across the street!
My front door!
My bathroom/laundry room. When we moved in this room had a boring rectangle plain mirror, boring light fixture, lame faucet and white walls. Not for long! As soon as we closed I headed to Home Depot and painted it up! Love the way it turned out!

The hallway that shows our front door from our living area!
Looking out to our gated patio area! Can't wait to have a barbecue!
Our kitchen Area
Kitchen / Living Area. If you haven't already figured it out our living room and kitchen is all one big room.
Our Living Area...I cant believe I took a picture with my couch looking like that and pillows on the floor! You can judge me...I totally judge myself!