Sunday, January 20, 2013

Holy Moly have I been a blog slacker! So a couple of weeks ago I was getting my hair done and I was talking to my fab hair person Debbi and we were talking about adoption. I was telling her some of the comments that people make that can sometimes annoy, offend or hurt my feelings. So I thought I would just list a couple and explain why they can be sometimes offensive. 
1. Anytime someone says...She gave him up.
In the Adoption community those two words "gave up" are not in our vocabulary!! As parents to the most beautiful baby boy we 100% believe that she didn't give him up...she placed him with his parents. And not only do Morgan and I think this but so does his Birth Mom! I strongly believe that if birth moms thought for one second that the were giving there babies up they would NEVER be able to place those babies. The term Give-Up to me means that you get rid of something. Our birth mom could not get rid of us if she tried. She will be in our lives forever! She will be in Gavin's life forever! 
2. Is it weird to see his Birth Mom? 
How can I say this in a lady like fashion.... HELL NO!!! Sorry that is the best way I could say it. Of course I love this girl because she brought Gavin into this world but I honestly like her! When Gavin was born and it was placement day I was excited to see and hold him but my heart and soul needed to hug her! I wanted her in my arms and I only thought about her. It has never been awkward or weird to see her or spend time with her. She is an extension of our family! Luckily for us we were able to build a relationship with her before Gavin was born. I think its that relationship that we started week 14 of her pregnancy that helped us through it. I can only wish that every birth mom/parent could meet and find there family as soon as possible so they can get to know each other so the adoption process is easier. 
3. He is so lucky to have you guys! 
And YES he is....but we are 100% the lucky ones! I get so frustrated when people say this because his birth mom is a wonderful person and she could have raised Gavin. She knew though that Gavin was meant to be in our family. We know that our Heavenly Father has a plan for all of us and his plan was to send Gavin to us though her! We are just so lucky and blessed that she recognized that plan!

I don't know why I wrote this but I just felt like that I could shed some light on some things that can sometimes hurt ones feelings. But People should ask asking in a sincere way we are able to learn from others experiences. Peace out though and spread the word that Adoption is a freaking miracle!!! 


Danielle said...

Oh man I miss you. Thanks for this awesome advice. I'm sure I've said some of this stuff before, not knowing. I'm so glad you blogged, now you need to post pictures of that little cutie!! Loved your Christmas card, by the way. What a cute fam.